For ordinary sins	White Bread
For erotic sins	French Bread
For particularly dark sins	Pumpernickel
For complex sins	Multi-Grain
For twisted sins	Pretzels
For tasteless sins	Rice Cakes
For sins of indecision	Waffles
For sins committed in haste	Matzoh
For sins of chutzpah	Fresh Bread
For substance abuse	Stoned Wheat
For use of heavy drugs	Poppy Seed
For petty larceny	Stollen
For committing auto theft	Caraway
For timidity/cowardice	Milk Toast
For ill-temperedness	Sourdough
For silliness, eccentricity	Nut Bread
For not giving full value	Shortbread
For jingoism, chauvinism	Yankee Doodles
For excessive irony	Rye Bread
For unnecessary chances	Hero Bread
For telling bad jokes/puns	Corn Bread
For war-mongering	Kaiser Rolls
For dressing immodestly	Tarts
For causing injury to others	Tortes
For lechery and promiscuity	Hot Buns
For promiscuity with gentiles	Hot Cross Buns
For racist attitudes	Crackers
For sophisticated racism	Ritz Crackers
For being holier than thou	Bagels
For abrasiveness	Grits
For dropping in without notice	Popovers
For over-eating	Stuffing
For impetuosity	Quick Bread
For indecent photography	Cheesecake
For raising your voice too often	Challah
For pride and egotism	Puff Pastry
For sycophancy, ass-kissing	Brownies
For being overly smothering	Angel Food Cake
For laziness	Any long loaf
For trashing the environment	Dumplings